Today is Valentines Day. And this is the first Valentines Day I get to spend out in the free world…
I’m going to try and make today a nice special day for me and my girlfriend. Because truth be told, every holiday I’ve been out here for thus far has been a disaster.
Seriously, every one of them.
My birthday-not so much.
New years-huge disaster.
Yep I don’t think there has been a holiday yet that hasn’t turned out to be a disaster …
So, there’s hope for today that that won’t happen.
Sorry also for snapping a little lately. And thank God I didn’t post YESTERDAY…
OhmyGod that would have been…
Yep, times are tough as fuck right now for ol Joe out here in the free world…
Bills are piling up.
Work has not been the best (as in actually having work that is….)
And old demons are playing on my conscious quite a bit.
But despite all that, I’m still focused on keeping on…
Gotta maintain the good fight and keep an optimistic outlook.
I’m constantly looking for BETTER MORE STABLE work.
And I’m looking to further my art ventures as much as I can, too.
Something will come from all this dedication as long as I just stay after it.
And stay after it, I do.
Today, I just want today to be a good day. A day where I can make my girlfriend happy and I can get done what I am supposed too.
You know, all this that I’m going through right now is EXACTLY why guys end up going back to prison…
It’s fucking de ja vu.
I mean, this was how it all started for me the last time before I spiraled out of control and ended up getting arrested and sent back to prison for 7 years.
I can’t let that happen this time.
And I won’t.
I remember the last time, back in 2008…
I had just gotten laid off from my job because of the “recession.”
I asked my girlfriend at the time, I said, “what is something that would make you NOT want to be with me..?”
“If you didn’t have a job and if we had no money.” She said.
Drug sales entered the picture.
Definitely not going down that road again.
Moving on to more positive things…
It’s Valentines Day folks..! And I hope yours is a special one spent with someone just as special..!
I’m thankful that I’m not in prison for this one and that I’m able to spend it out here with the woman I love. No matter the circumstances. Fuck it for today.
Today is about love.
Tomorrow the stress can return.
Happy Valentines Day everyone.