A grocery store almost killed me.

Today i went to the grocery store and damn near fell apart in there…

It was so busy and i couldn’t understand why…

Oh.

Then i remembered why…

It was the 1st of the month…

Shout out to food stamps…

Shout out to social services who just denied me food stamps or any other type of assistant because Im a drug offender…

Yeah, forget the fact Im a non violent lowly ol’ drug offender…

I got less rights than a sex offender. Can you believe that..?!

Anyways…

Back to the grocery store though…

Yeah. It was super busy…

I felt pretty uncomfortable in there too.

First, there was this woman i kept running into…

Then, i noticed she kept looking at me like i was crazy…

I feel like she thought maybe i was following her. Like maybe she was worried i was stalking her. Or maybe she was thinking something worse…

So that was fucking with me…

Then i got lost a few times in the store and i felt like the people working in there thought i was trying to steal something…

So that was fucking with me too…

Yeah…

This anxiety is at times more than i can handle.

But i feel like the only way that is going to get better is by facing these fears of public settings head on.

My girl asked me how i was able to handle being around large groups of people while in prison…

I told her that was different.

In prison, we’re all the same kinda.

We’re all prisoners.

Out here though…

I feel like I’m an outcast.

Like i don’t even really belong out here.

I feel like i stick out and everyone sees right through my efforts to look like I’m a normal person who belongs in society.

But oh well. I guess that’s just what i gotta deal with.

No matter what it is. I just take it in stride.

I got a nice little story to tell you about something i think is pretty interesting and i think you’ll find it the same…

But ill save that for tomorrow…

Check out @joepguerrero on vine, twitter, and instagram for more joewriteshiswrongs content…

Also check out facebook.com/joewriteshiswrongs 

That’s a page i really need to put some renovations into. But shoot in over there and check out some of my more classic joewriteshiswrongs content.

You all are so very awesome who check out, like, and follow what i’m trying  to do here…

I promise…

All of this is leading to something amazing…

I just ain’t exactly sure what that amazing thing is just yet.

Check back soon for more..!

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5 thoughts on “A grocery store almost killed me.

  1. You made it through the day in one piece today Joe! High five!
    Also, I just wanted to remind you that you are bigger than your fears and anxiety okay?Don’t let the fear rob you of all the good things God has in store for you.
    Oh and did you know that you are fearfully and marvelously made…..(Psalm 139:14)…….You are, so believe it okay!
    Tomorrow is a new day. Be blessed.

    Like

  2. Joe: You have *every* right to belong anywhere in public as much anyone else does! Somehow you need to shut down those false & negative voices that tell you otherwise. I would bet that no one in that store thought anything negative or different about you!

    Personally, I think that you are doing amazingly well especially considering that you have just been released! I am so proud of you for abstaining from smoking, drugs, & alcohol. That in itself is a huge achievement!

    Also, I was very impressed that on a “bad day”, you chose very wisely by painting.

    I totally believe that you will do well in this new chapter of your life. You have the smarts, the drive, determination & of course *tons* of artistic talent which combined can carry you far in life. (Just don’t get caught up in your womens’ drama …)!!!

    Conquer the world Joe! You can do this! xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

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