What I’m listen to right now…Rise Against “Help is on the way”


From one extreme to the other if you think about the song I posted last to the one I am listen to right now.

The first song I posted was “T.I. Eminem “All She Wrote”.

So from rap to this crazy hard core rock.

A confession though… Rise Against is one of my favorite bands and this song is a great example of why.

I love the type of shit this band sings about.

Based on the music video, I’m guessing this song is about hurricane Katrina. Though, when I first heard it, and just hearing the words, I thought it was about the BP oil disaster. I mean, with lyrics like “Five Thousand feet below, as black smoke engulfs the sky- the ocean floor explodes, eleven mothers cry…”

So to me, this song reminds me of that.

This song also reminds me of something else too.

During the time of this BP oil disaster, I was about a year into my incarceration and just really starting out with my cartoons.

This oil disaster gave me a lot of material to work with. Unfortunately, during this time I began creating editorial type cartoons about the situation in the gulf and submitting them to different newspapers.

When I would submit cartoons to these various newspapers, I would say something like “Hey I’m incarcerated trying to make a better way for myself… trying to turn a negative into a positive… maybe through my cartoons I could do that. If you decide to use one of my cartoons, please send me a copy of whatever page my work is displayed on, (a tare sheet) for my portfolio.”

Well, long story short, one day this guy comes up to me and said “Hey, didn’t you draw this?” And I’ll be damned if it wasn’t one of my cartoons I had submitted work threw.

They published one of my cartoons about the BP oil spill. But they never sent me the tare sheet I had asked for.

Fucking dicks. I thought.

Oh well. I learned a valuable lesson early into my cartooning adventure…

Many people are not willing to take serious or even honor the wishes of someone locked up trying to work towards better.

So yeah… this song reminds me a lot of that time.  And just the whole help is on the way…

I like that a lot.


Hustlin to survive in prison

In prison the name of the game is survival. But this is deeper than just watching your back. Though watching your back is one of the biggest things you must do while incarcerated,   It’s not the only things.

Survival in here also implies making your stay in these lofty state provided accommodations as comfortable as possible.

Having money to buy things is a big part of that. Especially when a lot of things you need to buy are things you need like hygiene products, writing supplies and food.

And though all of these things are important, food might even top the list of things needed. I mean, prison isn’t winning any awards for the way we are fed here.

To emphasis that point even further, I think it was in Texas where it happen. But it was something like some food got mixed up and the prisoners there were actually being fed DOG food! This went on for a    little while before anyone even realized there was a mix up.

Just a little “dog” food for thought.

Back to the whole survival thing though…

There are things prisoners want and need that make the time they must serve easier. Even if only just a little.  All of these things cost money of course. But not every prisoner is fortunate enough to have the outside support it takes to be able to pick up a phone or pen and ask someone to send them some money.

Ironically, in many places it is the prisoners who don’t have this luxury who actually survive a little or even a lot better than the guys who do. But only if they have a great hustle.

Many prisoners have hustles while incarcerated.

Some are good.

Some are great.

Some barely scrape by while others explode.

They have money coming in from everywhere.

Having a hustle while in prison is also a great way to pass the time. Your hustle becomes your job in here. It’s what you do every day to survive. And though some are innocent enough like washing and folding other prisoner’s laundry or even washing their dishes others are a lot more risky.

Other hustles carry heavier implications like getting caught, going to the hole, losing all your good time.

Some of these more risky hustles include tattooing, running a gambling ticket, or stealing out of the kitchen.

These are a few of the bigger hustles that can land you in a world of trouble in prison.

Hell, I should know firsthand.

In the beginning of my incarceration, tattooing was all I did. But I got caught like four different times. And not because of my own doing. I didn’t just let a CO walk up on me while I was running ink. No. The reason I got caught was because of some hatin ass mother fucker always telling it.

Once again the whole snitching thing.

Finally, I came to realize it just wasn’t worth it. It’s hard to duck the guards AND the snitches.

Prison is its own little society equipped with its own throbbing economy that is in part kept alive by hustles.

These hustles are like 9-5 jobs for prisoners…

Keeping them busy.

Helping them thru the time they must serve.

A funny little thought…

While people in the real world wake up every day and get ready for work, so do prisoners. Only in a lot of cases their work includes lucrative hustles.

Prisoners wake up thinking about how to not get caught today.

What they must watch out for in order to survive and prosper.

Prison hustles are exciting, thrilling and adventurous. So this next week is dedicated to just that… prison hustles.

Sorta like shark week on Discovery channel. Except instead of sharks, everything here will be related to prison survival by whatever means necessary.

Get ready…. It’s survival week here on Joewriteshiswrongs.

The list is done…

I’ve just completed the top 5 reasons as to why you suck in prison… and if I could do it again I would have posted all 5 reasons at once instead of over the four days it took me to post them.

Oh well.

Hindsight is 20/20.

Hopefully you were able to keep up with the list and got a kick out of it.

Funny thing to…. There were a bunch of other reasons to why you suck in prison that missed the list because the top 5 reasons posted are time tested and proven true beyond any other reason.

So what are some other things that didn’t make the list…

Well having a wheelchair was one.  Or having a wheelchair and a pee tube attached to your cock. That was a reason me and my prison associates debated heavily through hysterical laughter.

Yes. We are horrible people.

Excessive talk about your mom was another reason that would have definitely made the list if it was the top 10 reasons why you suck.

Hell, my mother hasn’t spoken to me in over 8 years. So the last thing I am trying to do in prison is listen to some soft ass talk infinitely about how much his mommy loves him.

Yes. There are prisoners who do that.

State struck-ness another great contender of this category

First a little prison terminology… “State struck” means you cherish everything in prison but what you cherish is all the stupid shit like bars of soap and extra toilet paper.

Being state-struck can be taken to the extreme… like when a prisoner shines his state issued boots with floor wax. Or waxes the floor all day every day truly believing that these floors belong to him.  

These are some weird mother fuckers I tell ya.

State struck prisoners usually like to be petted like lap dogs for how good they perform tasks such as waxing floors or telling on who is running tattoos.

Yes. State struck prisoners are usually snitchy too.

As you can see, there are a few other things that could have made the list and I felt it would only be right to tell you about them here.

Thanks to everyone who kept up with the list. I promise the next one won’t be so drawn out.

Though it might be long as hell if I do post it all at once.

By the way, the next list is called “5 things you need to know about running a successful hustle in prison…”

That list is sure to intrigue.

So be on the lookout for that and much much more to come.

The top 5 continued number 1

Number 1 being a snitch… without question, this easily tops out as number one on this list. Being a snitch or even being thought of as someone who “tells” is the absolute worst thing you could ever be thought of. And yet, plenty of prisoners do just that- tell it.

It’s actually crazy but about two days ago a perfect example of this that ranks number 1 on the top 5 reasons of why you suck in prison took place.

Yesterday I was talking to a friend of mine and he told me this wild story about something that had happen in his housing unit the day before. 

He said this guy was getting some “ink” done when another prisoner went to the officer’s booth and told on him.

The officer’s booth is positioned so that officers can see into both of the housing units in each building.

There are two housing units in each building.

Well, it just so happen that when this scum of the earth piece of shit prisoner went to tell it, at the little hole prisoners speak into to communicate with the officers, there was another prisoner from the other housing unit at the little hole on his side.

The other prisoner heard everything the snitch said and he was also a good friend of the guy who was being told on.

Quickly he sends word to the guy who was his friend who just got “dimed” out and that guy then confronted the snitch.

As this was relayed to me it went something like this…

“Hey did you just tell on me you piece of shit?!?”

“Come into the bathroom because I’m gonna beat your fucking ass.”

I guess the snitch said okay.  But first he went and grabbed two congregation locks and put them on his hand like some brass knuckles.

The snitch went into the bathroom and hit the guy he had just told on, and split him open pretty decent. But with blood gushing out of the guy who was told on he still commenced to whooping the snitches ass.

Oh, but that’s not all!

As these two are fighting in the restroom unseen by the officers, another piece of shit scum bag prisoner goes to the hole and tells on these two who are fighting!

What happen?

The officers rush in and lock up everyone.

The two who were fighting, the “teller” and the “tell-e”…

They go to the hole.

And… the snitch who went and told on the two who were fighting, he is also sent to the hole.

Good for the officers who locked up these two worthless snitch fucks and what a shame for the other guy.

All of this is just an example of why being a snitch tops out top on the list of what makes you suck in prison.

Top 5 things countdown

Number 2 bad money… You know what’s worse than having no money while incarcerated? Spending money you don’t have and will never have or be able to repay.

Bad money.

In every prison and every state there are prisoners who are known for their horrible credit. Those who are definitely not to be trusted to repay ANYTHING.

This in term makes them a liar and a cheat.

Nobody likes those types of people.

This is high on the list of why you suck in prison because prison like the real world is a functioning little high society because of money.

Money makes the world go round.

Even in prison.

Let me tell you some situations I have seen and heard about dealing with bad money and guys here in the “clink”.

One time this guy borrowed so much stuff, he ended up owing over $100! Knowing he would never be able to pay back what he owed, he walked right up to some random guy and punched him in the face.

They starting fighting, he went to the hole.  Then he got transferred.

Money forever lost but was never there anyways.

In other instances, and more commonly seen, guys will borrow a bunch of shit or run up some crazy bill owing money for one thing or another and then “check- in”.

They will go to the hole saying they are scared for their life.

Bad money always causes a lot of problems in prison.

Guys get beat up and robbed behind bad money.

They even get killed.

But not where I am at.

The prison I’m at is called a “go home” prison. But at a prison where guys aren’t going home… someone could easily lose their life behind what they owe. That is why bad money checks in so high on the list of why you suck in prison.

Top 5 things continued…continued

Number 3 bad hygiene habits… this should be by no real stretch of the imagination that guys with bad hygiene habits check in mid way through this list.

It may or may not come as a surprise to you but here in prison, there are always a few guys here for whatever reason that do not bathe regularly.

They have bad hygiene habits.

Some don’t wear deodorant…

Or brush their teeth.

Some might even have feet that stink so bad you might think a dead fetus is tucked neatly inside their shoes.

By the way I have no idea what a dead fetus smells like.

Not only do the worst of the worst reside in places like these, the most heinously do as well.

How bad are we talking here? You might wonder. Well picture a guy who is rumored to fashion the soap he washes himself with out of old, used, little pieces of soap he finds on the shower floor. Scraps of soap that have been discarded near the same drains that collect large quantities of “baby battered” daily.

Or how about a guy who refurbishes deodorants the same way. A guy who doesn’t take showers everyday and instead bathes himself in old, used, clumped together deodorants.

Rumor has it this guy puts the deodorant down the crack of his ass.

Maybe he does this because he realizes just how bad he smells.

Who knows.

I don’t know why he just doesn’t do the normal sensible thing and just take a shower. But then again this is prison after all. And there is not much here that is normal or sensible for that matter.

I shouldn’t have to say it but I will… No one wants to hang out with or socialize with a nasty mother fucker. Whether in prison or in the world, so, it’s easy to see what this makes the list of why you suck in prison.

Top 5 things continued

Number 4 is arrogance…  In terms of making number 4 on the list of why “you suck” in prison, this one is actually a little surprising to me.

For one, I had no idea that other prisoners felt so strongly about an arrogant acting idiot.

And for two. Sadly. I myself, at times, am an arrogant acting idiot.

Nobody really likes the guy in prison who is super full of himself. Especially if his reasons to feel this way are delusional.

To my defense, my reasons are not. My reasons to be full of myself are probably the polar opposite of delusional. Meaning they are very well founded.

As I write this I can’t help but think how arrogant I sound.

Quickly, though. Let’s exam my reasons to be cocky…

Captain, coach, lead striker in goal scorer for my little prison soccer team.

Mural painter, artist, awesome guy.

Phenomenal writer, great constructor of many words put together decently.

I’m the prison pen-pal connection….

If you’re lonely here I’m who you want to know.  I’m the reason a lot of guys have chicks to write.

I’m somewhat of an urban legend too. Many stories are told of the many chicks I met before I met my awesome Jen.

Don’t understand that too well?

Then I highly recommend you read “The Crazy Chick”.

With all that, I haven’t even MENTIONED Joewriteshiswrongs…

That’s a whole other can of worms by itself!

Interestingly enough, all of what I just mentioned isn’t even everything either. I could probably go on for a little while more about why I can at times be arrogant.

But wouldn’t that, in itself be arrogant?

See… I’m not THAT arrogant.

And let’s explore another side of this arrogance coin. Shall we?

What some see as arrogance can also be defined as confidence. But the reason it is seen by some as arrogance is like what they say about beauty…

It is all in the eye of the beholder. And if the beholder is a “hater” or is jealous or has envy in his heart about what someone else has that they them self do not have, then it is easy to say about that person that they are arrogant among many other things.

So as you can see, I justify this a lot because this one strikes a cord for me.

I’m sure my logic isn’t COMPLETELY right. But to some degree, it might be.

Just a little.

Or, maybe, I’m just being arrogant.

The top 5 things that make “you suck” in prison

Can you imagine being forced to live in close proximity to almost 100 people. Folks who come from all walks of life. Every denomination. Race. View of the world. View of others…especially other races. Other hatred. Some good decent guys and some guys you will loath and despise. Some you will like. Some you will most certainly want to fight. All mixed together in a Petri dish type of living environment?

Can you imagine this for just a second…?

Well everyday this is my reality…

Though there are some decent people here, most are not at all decent for one reason or another. And this is not me judging either. This is my simply stating the obvious.

This is prison after all. And though all of us have done whatever it is we have done that has landed us here, some people just really fit the criteria more than others. This I believe is what makes prisoners so unappealing to those in the free world or give guys like us such a bad rap.

With so much that can be thought of out there by people in the free world about people such as myself in here, it is easy to understand while prisoners are so unappealing.

But here is something even more…

What follows is what I have compiled as the top 5 things that make prisoners unappealing to OTHER prisoners.

The top 5 things that make YOU SUCK in prison…

All of these things matter dramatically in the grand scheme of things in prison especially when it comes to where you rank in prison life and stature how you’re viewed by the rest of the prison population.

So…. Read these things and observe this viable information because hey, you never know right?

Hopefully you never need to know…

I will bring you these top 5 things one at a time starting with 5 and working my way down to 1. Number 1 being the worst of course.

5. Being gay… ugh yes unfortunately this ranks as the top 5 things that make you suck in prison. And let’s not think of the literal meaning of that!

Sorry. I just threw up in my mouth a little.

It’s not hard to imagine that while in prison, you definitely don’t want to be hanging out with the guys who are batting for the other team. Unless, that is you don’t mind holding their bats, I guess.

Blah. Sorry. Again. The throw up thing.

If you are a complete straight arrow here, then gay is something you must avoid at all cost- in prison.

I know this sounds harsh and mean. But believe you me. Being gay or being known as someone who hangs around the gays is something that can totally isolate you or have you fitting in the “you suck” category.


People will avoid you like you have the bubonic plague.

Why is being gay in prison such a big deal? Well they gay guys in prison are fucking annoying. They are nosey flamboyant irritations to put it mildly. They walk around with their colored pencil makeup kits and their disgusting outfits thinking what? That they look CUTE!?!

Yeah right. Then comes their names. And what’s not to love about those. With grown men acting like total bitches calling themselves things like Mercedes, Lexis, Peaches, Delicious…

Some of these gay guys look like fucking linebackers to boot.

I guess you haven’t lived though until you have been in prison with a 6”7 dude who looks like he should wrestle in the WWE and calls himself “delicious”.

 All of these things put together are why being gay tops out as number 5 on this list.

Sick but still alive

Hello everyone. I just want to say a few things… first, what a sorry ass week of posts it’s been here on Joewriteshiswrongs.

I apologize.

I’ve been in a zombie like state all week because of this god for sake influenza or whatever it is I have.

Our housing unit is like the walking dead…a bunch of half lives with no brains, aimlessly staggering around looking like death.

Then again, it looks a lot like that, even when everyone isn’t sick.

Being sick in prison sucks.

It really sucks.

It’s probably equal to being sick in a third world country where medical attention is virtually nonexistent. Find that a little hard to believe..?  Well maybe you never read some of my older post about the medical department of correctional facilities… If you haven’t, I highly recommend you check out “The prison dentist fiasco,” or even more so, “A brain tumor test…Incarcerated.”

They will add a little insight to just what it is I am talking about.

Thanks for the “likes and well wishes” during my time of illness. That really means a lot.

Hopefully, I will get better soon and I will be back to my usual awesome self again.

Enough with all that, though.

All this sick talk has got me sick of sick talk!

In other news the giant mural I have been working on for oh, I don’t know… seems like FOREVER now! Well, that is finally winding on down and approaching its end.

Wait until you see just how awesome this thing is when it’s done.

It’s almost there now and I swear this is probably like a $5000 job in the world! But here in prison, I have been paid .45 cents an hour to create such a piece.

Oh, and by the way, to my good friend Justin Young… I’ve cursed you many of times for leaving me this project…

But seriously, for such an innocent little children’s piece… this thing has been a fucking nightmare.

For those of you who may not know, Justin Young was a mural painter here at the prison also. A great one at that, who was a big part of the reason I was hired as a mural painter myself. He was just recently released and is now home perusing all that he hopes to accomplish.  But before Justin (Well Q as he is more so known) was released, he drew this 20+ foot wide, 8ft tall children’s piece-monstrosity-in the gym. It’s for the kids when they come to visit here at the prison.

I’ve been painting on this project here for over 2 months now. But it is finally almost done. I wish I could show you all just how big this piece is in its entirety. But at the moment, I can’t.

I do however hope to show you the full piece in its entirety by the end of September.

What I can do now, is show you a few pictures I have taken with Jen in front of it, over the course of the last 2 months. Hopefully that will give you an idea of the progression I have made with this piece.  Those pictures will be included here as well.

That’s all for the moment.

Have a great weekend!

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