Kenny is not a fighter… (Nor a very good goalie for that matter)

A lot of you might know that soccer is a big part of my life here. But a couple of days ago there was a soccer game that I had to miss because of some important phone calls I had to make.

What a game to miss too.

As I am sitting on the phone I see two different guys being escorted to medical.

One who had hurt his leg pretty bad.

The other had somehow broken his finger.

After the game is over and the rec yard closed, the guys come inside and tell me this crazy tail of what happen to my bunkie Kenny.

Kenny, is a “sometimes goalie” for us sometimes which means he very rarely ever plays soccer. But when he does, he is a goalie.

Hence the name of “sometimes goalie”.

So Kenny, who is not a fighter at all is playing goalie. In our defense helping Kenny is a guy we will call Mr. UFC.

The reason I call this other guy Mr. UFC is because that is all that this guy does daily.

He trains constantly with a bunch of other guys who know that UFC shit pretty good. The only difference is that Mr. UFC is like the baddest of them all.

And here is how it all goes down…

Someone tries to take a shot on goal and Kenny stops it. Then Kenny tries to dish the ball out to someone on the defense but someone from the other team gets to the ball first. I guess there was this moment when the ball was in a very venerable position so Kenny makes a mad scramble after it as does Mr. UFC.

What happens next?

Well these two collide, of course. But not full body on body as you might imagine. More like Kenny’s knee completely against Mr. UFC temple! More like a flying hurricane knee thrust right into the side of this guy’s head.

As it was relayed to me the impact was displayed to be sickening.

Mr. UFC the baddest street fighter on the compound was instantly knocked out by a guy who was definitely “not about that life”.

They said it took like 10 minutes for Mr. UFC to come to and regain his composure.

After he did he was still dazed and confused for some time.

Go Kenny, right?

Since all of this happened me and Meeko have been having a lot of fun at Kenny’s expense.

Kenny will get off the phone and we will say something like “Did you tell her that you had to handle a mother fucker today?”

“Like baby, just had to knock this sucker out today.”

“He was only like the baddest guy on the compound, but really it was nothing.”

Just as the one guy got no points for beating up a guy in a wheelchair, Kenny get’s no points for his accidental TKO.


3 thoughts on “Kenny is not a fighter… (Nor a very good goalie for that matter)

  1. I got elbowed in the temple by a goalie one time. Concussion. I was out for ten seconds, and then I was like Rocky trying to stand up. Stand up. Fall down. Stand up. Stagger…like Mr. T had just punched me in the head ten times. Finally I got up and stayed up. The flow of play had gone to other end, and then the ball was kicked back toward me — the referee gave us a penalty because I was offsides.

    It’s like, excuse me for being knocked out cold, ha.

    Liked by 1 person

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